Quit Before You Are
Ordered to do So!
It’s so nice to be dependent! Everyone of us passed through that stage before we become independent. Fending for oneself is a major challenge. It means no work, no food, no clothing, no shelter, no marriage and so on.
When the time to quit comes, a child who is sought after by the parents to support him will suddenly discover that the parents bothers less about their welfare any longer. Indeed the parents will now expect the child to fend for himself. The child who is unprepared for this ‘promotion’ becomes psychologically disturbed, feels unloved, displays anger, and most often withdraws to himself.
It is a universal law that at one point in life everyone must account for his or her own sustenance. Therefore the earlier we begin to let our children realise it the better so that they will not fight us when the time comes. Indeed we can help them to smoothly transform to their new life if we have educated them well ahead of time before the time comes. Trying to prepare his children for this inevitable challenge, the writer had prepared his children’s minds to quit anytime from age 25! This is to enable them know that they are not going to be dependent for ever and that plan is fast working out now, even before they attained that age.
The benefit of this is simply that as they grow older, they become more and more conscious of the fact that sooner or later, they must become independent! So both children and parents are at peace with one another when it begun to happen.
When parents give their children the impression that they would continue to depend upon them, they have succeeded in making such children unprepared for the challenges ahead of them. Therefore it is important we let our children know their possible exit day well in advance so they can work towards being independent without tears.
This is also an opportunity to address those who are dependent upon others for every bit of their needs in the name of asking for a help. Help should be specific, time-driven and should have expiry date. Put yourself in the position of the person you depend upon and ask yourself if you would like to find yourself being dependent upon throughout your life-time. If the answer is no, it’s time you let the other person rest too by being on your own. Not only that you should not forget to promote yourself to the position of a helper too by singling out some people for help! By the way, don’t wait until you are asked to quit before you do so!
Good morning.
